The Wooden Spoon

Ever since I discovered Jim Lahey's recipe for no-knead bread, I've been messing around with it. First I started kneading it a little, because it seems unnatural to make bread without at least a minute or two of kneading. I also added sugar to it for a while, but the bread stuck to the pan. When my oven done broke down, I made bread on the grill. It wasn't a raging success, but it wasn't a total failure either.

After burning the hell out of six fingers and both thumbs when I picked up a screaming hot pan just out of a 500 degree oven, I stopped heating the pans before baking the bread. My pain-killer addled brain can process just so much information, and it only took a ten second distraction for me to forget that I needed pot holders. Then I spent a week at the beach in a house without a decent baking dish, so I baked the bread on a baking sheet lined with aluminum foil. I think Frank Zappa would not disagree that desperation and panic are actually the mothers of invention.

Here's my current bread recipe. This has to be put together the night before you want to bake the bread.

3 cups bread flour (You can use all-purpose, unbleached flour, but bread flour absorbs more water, which results in a crispier crust. Protein levels and all that complicated scientific crap)
1.5 - 2 cups water
1 tsp. yeast
1 scant tbls. salt (I use kosher salt. Use what you prefer)

Mix flour and salt together in a large bowl, then add yeast. Add water a little at a time, until it's damp but not too wet, i.e. it shouldn't stick to your hands when you touch it. Cover with plastic wrap and a towel and let rise overnight. DO NOT KNEAD.

In the morning, stir down the dough. DO NOT KNEAD. Cover again, and let rise for 2-3 hours. After it's risen, sprinkle some flour on a clean work surface, pour the dough on the flour, add a little flour on the top if it's sticky, and squeeze or gently knead just long enough to deflate the dough, no more than 2 minutes. As you're kneading, add some flour a little at a time, to keep the dough from getting too sticky to handle. Cover and let sit for 15 minutes. Gently knead dough for about 30 seconds, return to bowl and let sit for at least 90 minutes, and up to three hours.

Line a baking sheet with parchment paper (aluminum foil will also work), sprinkle it with cornmeal, and pour dough onto sheet. The dough tends to have a mind of its own, but you can reshape it by wetting your hands and gently moving the dough around until it looks presentable. Bake in a 450 degree oven for 45 minutes.

If you prefer to use a bread pan, line the pan with parchment paper, sprinkle with corn meal, pour dough into pan and bake at 450 degrees for 55 minutes.

When bread is done, immediately remove it from pan and let cool on a rack. I know it's hard to resist breaking into it right away, but it should sit for a least an hour. If you cut or tear into it before that, it can collapse, dry out, or both.

The point to this bread is flavor developed from a long, slow rise, a crisp outside and a light crumb. If you prefer a denser bread, i.e. no holes, knead it for three to five minutes instead of just a minute or two.

You can make this with whole wheat flour, but it won't be as light. If I want to add some whole wheat, I usually add a couple tablespoons at the beginning, or use it when I knead the bread. That gives it a little more body and flavor, but doesn't change the texture of the bread.

I know I'm probably the last person in the developed world who still kneads bread by hand, but seriously, if you need to use your standing mixer for this, and you don't have a physical disability, you should just buy your bread at the grocery store or a bakery. There's no real trick to kneading by hand, and if you put this dough in a standing mixer, it will overprocess. A lot of bread recipes call for up to 15 minutes of kneading. Believe me, after making bread for 30 years, I promise you there's not a bread in the world that requires more than five minutes of kneading at a time. If you're making more than two loaves, you get a pass. Just do it gently.